horror movie opening scene
white girl: i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.
white boy: come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.
white girl: you're just trying to scare me.
white boy: lmao
they continue walking for a few seconds
*white couple hears noise*
white girl: babe what that??
white boy: i'll go investigate
*leaves her alone*
*choking noises*
white girl: zack!!!
white boy: ha ha just kidding!
white girl: asshole!
white boy: im just playin babe
white girl: that wasnt funny but ur still cute
*playful kiss*
*things turn sexy*
*hear noise*
white boy: i'll go investigate
*he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*
*maybe a thud*
white girl: zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!
*she walks and he dead*
white girl: ahhh!!
*killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*
white girl: ahhh!!!
*white girl runs*
*dead end*
*hides*
*thinks she free n safe*
*guy catches her*
*cuts her*
*she dead*
opening title slashes across screen: BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D

poopflow:

shout out to all the people still following me even though im a fucking idiot

“You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want.”

S.E. Hinton

arcticmunkeez:

*goes a few hours without internet access* wow i’m so healthy and wild i could live in the woods

fagbarbie:

*doesn’t have internet access for a week*

image

bombing:

attention shoppers, will the owner of the blue monster truck parked outside please report to the front. that thing is fucking sick and the manager wants to shake your hand

live-as-a-teen:

dogepom:

patickstump:

if you shame girls about their breast size i will push you into traffic

"Who’s flat now?"

whos flat now

slenclerman:

*plays all your snapchats that i screenshotted at ur funeral*

tinychatter:

u know when u really like someone and literally every little thing they do is cute and no matter what face they make they always look perfect to you

studip:

if u askin about my bra size u better be planning on takin ur ass down to Victoria’s Secret to buy me some nice bras

astound:

I just want to lie in bed and not participate in life

shuckl:

wildy0ungbeautiful:

shuckl:

could i pay someone to take over my body who actually knows how to look after it so they can like. make me healthy again and then let me take over once i’m fit n healthy

You mean a personal trainer and a nutritionist

no i mean some sort of supernatural being who can do literally all of the work for me

embarrassmental:

narcotic:

what if people named their kids when they turn 18 so the kid has a name that fits its personality

image

♦FF